Left Brain.. Right Brain

Here's one of those little things that make you go hmmmm....

Left brain, right brain. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction and there's nothing you can do about it.

And here's something we all used to do at school and amaze ourselves with.

Stand close to a wall and try to raise your arm straight out to the side (since you're next to the wall, you'll be pressing quite hard against the wall) Keep trying to lift for a few minutes, then move away from the wall. Your arm will raise itself out to the side, without your doing anything.

I still think that's spooky!

Cat Wisdom

People know I have cats, so I get all sorts of cat-related stuff in my email. I thought I'd share a couple of them here, since my blog seems to be experiencing the January blahs.

RULES CATS LIVE BY

Demand Attention.
You may have to lie on someone's head while they sleep or plant your body in front of the television while they watch, but don't rest until you get all you're entitled to.

Speech is Overrated.
You don't have to talk to be the most adorable and lovable one in the house.

Put Up With Your Parents.
So they make you wear Rhinestones - - - it's not the end of the world. Besides, they are the ones who feed you.

Use Your Senses.
Smell, taste, and touch everything, be it an old shoe or a speck of dirt. Even the smallest item is worthy of your attention.

Practice Good Hygiene.
If you're dirty, do what you must, where you must, when you must. It doesn't matter who's watching.

Stand Up For Yourself
If someone bothers you, get your back up and show a little claw. You're too cute to be yelled at.

There's No Such Thing As Too Much Groveling.
Don't be afraid to cuddle, purr, and nuzzle shamelessly to get your way.

Simplify, Simplify, Simplify.
All that's really required is that you eat, sleep, love and be loved, and well - - - do your business

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RULES OF ETIQUETTE FOR INEXPERIENCED CATS

• Determine quickly which guest hates cats. Sit on that lap. If you can arrange to have cat food on your breath so much the better. for guests who say, "I love kitties," be ready with aloof disdain.
  
  
• Always accompany guests to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do anything. Just sit and stare.
  
  
• Do not allow closed doors in any room. When you have ordered an outside door opened, stand half in and half out and think about several things. This is particularly important during very cold weather or mosquito season.
  
  
• If one person is busy and another idle, sit with the busy one. For book readers, get in close under the chin unless you can lie across the book itself. For people doing paperwork, sit on the paper being worked on. After being removed for the second time, push anything movable off the table - - - pens, pencils, etc. - - - one at a time.
  
  
• Get enough sleep during the daytime so that you are fresh for playing between 2 and 4 a.m.
  

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NOTES FROM AN EXPERIENCED CAT

• I will not puff my entire body to twice its size for no reason after my human has watched a horror movie.
  
  
• I will not stand on the bathroom counter, stare down the hall, and growl at NOTHING after my human has watched the X-Files.
  
  
• I will not eat large numbers of assorted bugs and them puke them up so my human can see that I'm getting plenty of roughage.
  
  
• I will not drag dirty socks onto the bed at night and then yell at the top of my lungs so that my humans can admire my "kill."
  
  
• I will not perch on my human's chest in the middle of the night and stare until they wake up.
  
  
• I will not play Herd of Thundering Wildebeests Stampeding Across the Plains of the Serengeti over my human's bed while they are sleeping.
  
  
  
• Screaming at a can of tuna will not make it open itself.
  
  
• Staring into the fireplace will not make the flames and heat appear.
  
• If I stick my paw into a container to see if there is anything in it, I will not hiss and scratch when my human has to shave me to get the rubber cement out of my fur.
  
  
• If I bite the cactus it will bite back.
  
  
• It is not a good idea to lap up the powdered creamer before it dissolves in hot coffee.
  
  
• When it rains, it will be raining on all sides of the house. It is not necessary to check every door.
  
  
• I will not play, "dead cat on the stairs," when my humans are going up or down, or else one of these days it will really come true.
  
  
• When my human is typing at the computer her forearms are not a hammock.
  
  
• Computer and TV screens do not exist to backlight my lovely tail.
  
  
  
• I will not walk on the key board when my human is writing important adagfsg gdjag ;ln.
  
  
• I will not be miffed at my human all day and then kiss her on the nose at 1 am. to tell her she is forgiven and can now pet me.
  
  
• If I must claw my human I will l not do it in such a way that the scars resemble a botched suicide attempt.
  
  
• If I must give a present to my human guests, my toy mouse is much more socially acceptable than a big live bug, even if it isn't as tasty.
  
  
  
• A warm pepperoni pizza is not a good place for naps.
  
  

A New Year, a New Me

The last thing I want to do is to become a "diet bore" but this blog would not be complete if I failed to mention that I plunged in with both feet and signed up for Nutrisystem.

I think I've mentioned before in this blog that I am, more or less, a non-cook. I can, if circumstances dictate, whip up bacon and eggs for breakfast. I even rustled up a pot roast for my Christmas dinner. But generally speaking, I'm your Stouffer's frozen entree kind of girl. So the thought of preparing low-fat, low-calorie, healthy meals from scratch has been enough to put me off dieting for.. well, forever.

So I was sitting watching TV the other night and saw an ad for Nutrisystem, a diet plan which delivers prepared foods right to your door. (Actually, I've seen the ad several times over the past couple of months, but I'm slow to get motivated) The most I will have to do is open a package, add water and nuke, or possibly open a can. That's over-simplifying it a bit, but it just seems that it's a system that is far more in tune with the way I am than any other I have seen.

Part of the process involved buying a bathroom scale, so I can get my starting weight. Wow! All I can say is it's amazing how you can delude yourself that you haven't put on that much weight. Let me just say I was floored when I saw how much I have actually put on since I quit smoking.

So... waiting for the food shipment to arrive, I have at least started drinking apparent gallons of water, and have started a journal of what I eat - which actually isn't that much usually. All good practice for when I start the system "for real."

But hopefully, the specially selected foods from Nutrisystem, along with veggies, fruit and yogurt etc., as well as regular exercise on my stationary bike and jiggling along with the Belly Dancing for Total Fitness DVD, will have the desired effect and I can start shedding these excess pounds.

Wish me luck :-)

Words of Wisdom

This arrived in my inbox today - one of those "forward this on and it will bring you luck" things. Well I just don't do the email forwarding thing like so many people I know. But I do have this blog....

I haven't posted anything yet this year, so I thought I'd post this here instead of clogging up company bandwidth by emailing it. It has some nice sentiments and offers some words of wisdom for life.

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ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.


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